Waiting for Perfect

If you've read my blogs for very long at all, you've probably noticed that I enjoy good, thought-provoking quotes.  There is often a lot of truth wrapped up in a pithy sentence or two.  That is certainly true for this quote: 

"Don't wait until everything is just right.  It will never be perfect.  There will always be challenges, obstacles and less than perfect conditions.  So what!  Get started now.  With each step you take, you will grow stronger and stronger, more and more skilled, more and more self-confident and more and more successful.  ~ Mark Victor Hansen

I am the kind of person who likes to get her ducks in a row, get everything "just so" before I take the first step.  There have been a number of things in my life over the past 4-5 years that have moved me outside of my comfort zone as I've been forced to learn as I go instead of getting everything right first.  I've realized that waiting until optimal conditions, with everything in place and all obstacles cleared away, usually means that I keep waiting . . . and waiting . . . Life has a way of being messy and less-than-perfect, and just as soon as one obstacle is eliminated, two more pop up.

That was certainly true of my past weight loss efforts.  I wanted the calendar clear, with nothing on the horizon that would involve food and tempt me to go off plan.  Things had to be good at work - no stress, and there certainly couldn't be any issues at home.  When all of these things were properly aligned, I could focus on losing weight.  However, the minute life happened - good or bad - the diet was once again off.  And trying to lose weight around the holidays?  Forget it!  Talk about a less-than-ideal time to lose weight!

I was very much in a mindset of wanting to wait for the perfect time to start another program just prior to placing my first Medifast order.  I started this program on June 24, 2007, just when the summer fresh fruits were beginning to appear at our local farmer's market.  I really like fruit, so the thought of not eating fruit for an entire summer was troubling and I seriously considered waiting until fall to begin the program.  But then I thought about the honey crisp apples, my favorites, that made their appearance in the fall.  Fall wouldn't be a good time to start, either!  But then after fall, I knew the holidays would be here and who in their right mind starts a weight loss program during the holidays?

So, in mid-June of 2007, as I tried to figure out when I should place my order and get started, I realized that the next "convenient" time to start the program wouldn't be until January 2, 2008 - more than six months away.  I realized that I absolutely could not go that much longer at the weight I was at (260), and I feared that if I waited six more months, my weight would be much higher. 

Was it the ideal time for me to start?  That's hard to say.  All I know was that it was the right time to start.  I started the program two weeks before my birthday and one month before our two-week vacation at a lake cottage we rented. I started this program at the beginning of a summer filled with cookouts and get-togethers with family and friends.  It wasn't ideal and there were certainly obstacles to address, but it was the right time for me - and I couldn't have imagined how much my life would change in the process.

Some of you are just getting started on this program and the holidays are staring you in the face.  This isn't an ideal time for you to start, either, but it's the right time because you're ready to change your life.  Good for you for not waiting until things are perfect . . . you won't regret the choices you're making!  Think about how much better you're going to feel on January 2 when you're 10 or 20 pounds lighter than you are today :-).

You've made a great choice in beginning this program, and each choice you make today, tomorrow and the day after that will bring you closer to a healthier future.  Choose wisely :-)

A Safe Investment

In this time of economic uncertainty, most of us want to make sure that we get the best return possible on our investments.  Whether it's our 401K or IRA or some other type of investment we've made to ensure our financial future, we want to see growth over time.  We review our quarterly reports and look for an increase from the previous quarter and we watch for trends that indicate future growth.

Would you be willing to invest $100 if you could be guaranteed a million dollar return?  (Who wouldn't, right?)

That's what you're doing right now.  The investment you're making in your health is a small investment when it's compared to your future return - a longer, healthier life.  The potential return on your health is worth far more than a million dollars, too!

Yes, there is the financial investment you're making to purchase the products needed to do this program, and there is also the mental and emotional investment.  There is hard work involved in ridding ourselves of old habits that didn't serve us well and embracing new, healthier habits.  It's not always easy and it's not always fun, but incorporating these healthy habits will pay long-term, priceless dividends.

When we have our health - when we feel as good as we can possibly feel - we're able to enjoy our lives to the fullest.  It doesn't matter how much money we have or how much stuff we've collected, if we're struggling with health issues and living in a state of unhealth or even disease, the money and the stuff don't matter.  We may be wise with our financial investments, but if we aren't being wise in our health investments, we won't be able to fully enjoy the benefits of our 401Ks and IRAs.  If we aren't wise in the choices we make for our health now, those financial investments may end up being drained for medication and other medical expenses.  I don't know about you, but that's not how I want to spend my money!

The return on financial investments is a bit uncertain right now, but the investment in our health has a solid track record on its return.  This is a long-term investment, and while many of us see almost immediate results and have been able to reduce or eliminate medications, the real returns will be evident in the years ahead.

The choices we make today determine the future return we will receive.  Choose wisely :-)

Making Decisions

Sometimes we think that what has been will always be, or we think that where we are is "it" and we're convinced that things will never change.  If we've had a long history of failed attempts at losing weight, it's easy to believe that our dieting history determines our future.  Here's a quote that challenges this kind of thinking:

"It's not what is happening to you now or what has happened in the past that determines who you become.  Rather, it's your decisions about what to focus on, what things mean to you, and what you're going to do with them that will determine your ultimate destiny." ~ Anthony Robbins

The decisions we made in the past had a significant impact on where we are today, and many of those decisions became habits over time.  But habits are still decisions, even if we aren't acutely aware that we're deciding each and every time.  The reason I know these are really decisions is because we have the ability to change them if we choose to do so.  We can get rid of unhealthy habits that don't serve us and we can develop an entirely new set of habits that put us on a new path - if we want to.

Going back to Robbins' quote, "your decisions about what to focus on, what things mean to you, and what you're going to do with them" - infused in each of these statements is choice.  We choose what we're going to focus on, whether it be past failures or current frustrations or future hopes and dreams that include being at a healthy weight.  If we look up and focus on the sky, we can't focus on the ground.  If we fix our gaze on the ground, we can't see the sky.  Where we choose to focus is critical, and it is a decision we have to make every day.

Robbins says that we decide "what things mean" to us - we attach a value and that value determines what we do with things.  Because the focus of this blog is about making healthy choices, let me apply this to the food choices we make.  If we value being healthy - if we've made a fundamental choice to get to a healthy weight - then that value will determine the food choices that we make.  If we value immediate gratification more than being healthy, that value will lead us to make different choices.

The choices of what we're going to focus on, what things mean to us and what we're going to do with them WILL, in large part, determine the future of our health.  That future may seem a long way away, but we're getting there one day and one choice at a time.  Choose wisely :-)

Focusing Ahead

I once read a story about a man who got on a tractor for the first time.  He described the thrill of starting up the engine, dropping the plow, and heading out across the field.  As he drove the tractor, he marveled at all of the gauges and gadgets on the tractor and enjoyed the feel of the steering wheel.  Everything was perfect until he looked back to admire his results.  Instead of seeing the straight lines he expected, he described what he saw as resembling a slithering snake, "with more bends and curves than the Indianapolis Motor Speedway."  In his excitement to plow a field for the very first time, he forgot the cardinal rule of plowing:  plow with your eye on the fence post ahead.  On the return trip he did just that and his line was straight.  He realized that the first row was messed up because he didn't have a focus point.

Do you have a focus point?  Are you keeping your eyes on where you're going, or are you finding yourself being distracted by the details?  When we're focused on where we're heading, that not only keeps us moving forward, but it keeps us moving in a straight line to our goal.  If we're looking around at all of the things we "can't have" right now, if we're looking at all of the potential obstacles that might come our way, our path to goal may look a lot like the man's first plow line - filled with twists and turns.

By focusing on our goal, we are more likely to get there in a straight line.  We are continually reminded of where we're going and what we want, and that reminder will keep all of the distractions and obstacles on the sidelines.  We may be aware of them because we see them with our peripheral vision, but they are a blur as we go past them because our eyes are fixed on our goal.

Keeping our focus is critically important as we enter into the holiday season, starting with tomorrow's Thanksgiving dinner.  Focusing on what we REALLY want, and focusing on those across the table instead of what's on (or not on . . . ) our plate will make all the difference!

Where are you choosing to focus today?  Your choice will determine your path to goal . . . choose wisely and have a wonderful - and healthy - Thanksgiving -:)

No Shortcuts

We all want change in our lives, to some degree or another.  Everyone on this program wants to change their weight and many want to improve their health - I know I wanted both. 

I've often wished that I had either a magic wand or a fairy godmother so that any and all changes could happen in an instant - one wave of the wand and poof!  it's done.  I'd have the result I wanted without going through the process I needed to get there.  Honestly, sometimes that sounds SO good to me!

I watched a program on TV a while back about a man who was obsessed with plastic surgery.  He went so far as to get implants that gave the look of bulging arm muscles, because he said he wanted the look but didn't have the time or desire to work out at the gym.   So he got the look alright, but didn't have the true muscle mass he needed and he also didn't have the satisfaction that would have come had he built up real muscles over time.

I often hate the process.  I'm not a particularly patient person by nature (God is continuing to grow me in this area), so when results aren't almost immediately forthcoming, it's tempting for me to grow weary of the process.  That was certainly the case with every other weight loss program I ever went on.  They were a lot of work and the progress was agonizingly slow and I lost interest before I ever got very far.

Even on 5&1, though there isn't a safer way to lose weight quickly, it's still a process that happens over time.  For me, it was almost 11 months of eating 5 Medifast meals every day and one lean & green, and those 11 months sometimes seemed eternal.  Honestly, some DAYS on 5&1 felt like an eternity :-). 

What I didn't fully understand at the time, but I see more clearly now, is that those 11 months were a time of sowing seeds of new actions and responses.  I was seeing results right along, which kept me motivated, but the process of learning to eat a different way planted seeds that are now bearing fruit.  Those seeds planted while I was on 5&1 are now becoming a crop of lifestyle changes and healthy habits that have enabled me to stay healthy for almost 4-1/2 years.  Had I had the magic wand and reached my goal in an instant, I would not have done the work I needed to do to maintain my weight loss and ensure a healthy lifestyle for the rest of my life.

Planting seeds of new, healthy habits happens one day and one choice at a time, so choose wisely :-)

Avoiding the Energy Drain

Staying on plan is a lot of work.  There's no getting around it.  Opening packets isn't hard, but being surrounded by the ever-present temptations IS hard and it takes constant focus to avoid them.  That focus can be exhausting sometimes. 

That's true, but did you know that it's even more exhausting to give in to temptation and go off plan?

I read that it takes as much energy to avoid a task as it does to do it; procrastination saps energy while completion gives relief.

This was certainly true for me.  I cheated miserably on every other program I'd ever been on until I started on 5&1, and the energy I spent cheating really was exhausting and demoralizing.  The internal struggle pre and post cheat went something like this:  "That really looks good and I want it.  I know I'm not supposed to have it, but it really looks good and I'm hungry/tired/stressed and I deserve it.  I shouldn't have it . . . I really shouldn't have it.  OK, I'll just have a bite.  Well, maybe half won't be too bad . . . Ugh, I ate the whole thing.  Since I ate one, I'll eat the other one so I won't be tempted anymore . . . Well, I really blew it.  How could I be so stupid and weak?  I don't even feel good - I ate way too much.  I'm never going to lose weight.  Why do I even try?  I wish I hadn't eaten the stupid thing - it wasn't worth it."

That cycle was repeated over and over again, and it was emotionally exhausting.  Every time the cycle was repeated, I felt more demoralized and defeated and reaching a healthy weight seemed just a little further away.  Talk about an energy drain!

Contrast that with the energy involved in staying on plan:  "That really looks good and I want it.  But I also really want to get to a healthy weight and I want that more than I want the food.  I can have that if I want, but I am choosing to not eat that right now because it won't get me where I want to go . . . Wow, I did it - I didn't cheat.  Whew!  I really did it - that feels great!"  Instead of feeling emotionally drained, this scenario energizes you - it really does!

I remember really struggling at times to stay on plan and there were a few times when I almost caved.  The internal dialogue was certainly more extended than the example listed above.  However, there was SUCH a feeling of relief when I walked away - I was flooded with relief and joy once the temptation had passed.  The realization that I really could stay on plan gave me hope that I would eventually reach my goal and it also strengthened my "no thank you muscle" for the next inevitable temptation.  Knowing that I'd resisted once made it just a bit easier to resist the next time, and that next time made it even easier to resist the time after that.

So how are you going to spend your energy today?  It all depends on the choices you make, so choose wisely :-)

Decisions . . . Decisions . . .

"The craving you had for an hour or the body you've wanted for a lifetime - you get to choose."

It really does come down to what we choose, and we will make that choices, and the choices that support that choice, based on what it is that we really want.

Many of us want BOTH the craving we had for an hour AND the body (and the health!) we've wanted for a lifetime.  We don't want to choose - we want them both, at the same time.  But that's not possible.  There may be a few people blessed with a killer metabolism that allows them to eat anything they want and still be thin, but the fact that you're reading this blog is probably an indication that you don't have one of those killer metabolisms - and neither do I.  And the reality is that if those rare individuals with killer metabolisms are eating junk all day, they may be thin but still not healthy and may well be on a path to disease.

Every day we have to make choices that will either bring us to a healthy weight and a healthier body or make choices that will lead us down a very different path.  That other path is the one that many of us have been on for years, perhaps decades.  It is a well-worn path that's been made smooth by the number of times we've been down it.  It's an easy path to walk because it's so familiar . . . the problem is that it's taken us to a place we didn't want to be and leads to an even less desirable place if we continue.

Being on a journey to a healthier body isn't easy.  The path is a new one for many, and for others it's a path we haven't been on in years.  It's a bumpy path with pitfalls and temptations threatening us at every turn.  Sometimes it feels too hard and we can question whether it's going to be worth it, especially when the next temptation is staring us in the face. 

It's at those times that it's important to take a step back, take a deep breath and ask - for the hundredth time if necessary - what is it that you REALLY want?  You will make the choices that support what you want. 

You get to choose . . . choose wisely :-)

Changing Priorities

"When our old priorities don't go with our new life, we either return to our old life or adopt new priorities." 


My old priorities as they related to food and my health were WAY off.  I was very much focused on instant gratification and only gave a passing nod to the idea that what I was putting in my mouth today could negatively impact me tomorrow.  I was certainly aware of the dangers of obesity, but I always had VERY good intentions to "start being good tomorrow."  I can't tell you how many "last suppers" I've had in my life as I tried to eat up all of the "bad food" before starting on the next sure-thing diet.  I knew that exercise was important, and I could give a pretty good list of all of the reasons why, but there was never time to exercise today - but I'd promise myself that I'd get started tomorrow.  My priorities were pretty much on the here and now, and "tomorrow" never showed up on my calendar.  Every day was only "today."

To this day, it amazes me that God led me to the right program at the right time, knowing that I was finally - FINALLY - ready to make permanent changes in my life.  I didn't even realize it at the time, and that the thought that I could really make permanent, positive changes seemed impossible.

However, June 24, 2007 was the beginning of what has truly been a life-changing journey, and, with God's help, I have made permanent changes in my life.  I know I can never return to that old life, so I've been forced to adopt some new priorities.  Many of these priorities flow out of my primary choice/ secondary choice philosophy (are you tired of hearing about this yet?).

Some of my priorities - my most important priorities - remain unchanged: my faith and my family.  However, other priorities have been rearranged because being healthy is now one of my new, permanent priorities - a primary choice. 

According to the statistics, 85% (or more) of people who lose weight end up gaining it all back, plus some, within two years.  I can't help but wonder if many of these people return to their old, overweight life because they never changed their priorities.

Priorities don't automatically change.  They only change as we choose to change them.  It's never an easy task, but if we don't change our priorities to support our new, healthy life, sooner or later we'll find ourselves in a place we vowed we'd never see again.

Changing priorities happens one day at a time, one choice at a time.  What choice are you making today?  Choose wisely :-)

Staying in the Game

In my last blog I wrote about not quitting half-way through the game.  I know that's easier said than done!  How do you keep going when you just want to be done?

First of all, I understand completely that feeling.  I got tired of eating the food and I got tired of not eating so many other things.  It took me two days short of 11 months to reach my goal and while the months went fast, especially as I look back, there were some mighty long days!  It wasn't always fun.

I remember that about four months into the program I started questioning how long I would be on plan.  It was just before Thanksgiving and I had 26 people coming to my house for dinner that year, so I knew that I'd be doing a lot of cooking and baking.  I'd made really good progress with my weight loss and had dropped several sizes, so I was in a much better place than I'd been when I started the plan that June.  I toyed with taking a small break to really enjoy Thanksgiving dinner and I also considered taking a break between Thanksgiving and New Years and then starting in again on January 2. 

I considered this, but I didn't do it.  In fact, I stayed on plan through the holidays and lost 18 pounds between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day.  When I reached New Year's Day, I didn't know that it would be over 5-1/2 more months until I reached my goal, but I was really happy that I'd continued to make progress through what is admittedly the toughest time of the year.

So how and why did I do that?  Again, it wasn't easy, but I stayed on plan because I knew that what I wanted most was to get to a healthy weight and get on with the rest of my life, and I wanted it more than I wanted the food.  I really, really wanted the food - don't get me wrong - but I wanted something else even more.

Chapter 3 of Dr. A's Habits of Health is entitled, "Motivation for Change."  He describes a typical and very predictable pattern that most of us will recognize from our past dieting experiences, a pattern based on wanting to change to fix a problem.  Here's the pattern:

1. Emotional conflict leads you to act
2. Because you've acted, you feel better - even if the situation hasn't changed much
3. Feeling better takes the pressure off, lessening the emotional conflict
4. Less emotional conflict means there's less reason to continue doing the things that reduced the conflict in the first place
5. Since you feel better, you no longer feel a pressing need to follow through on your actions.
6.  And the original behavior returns.

That is how we've ended up in a yo-yo dieting pattern, losing and gaining, losing and gaining over the years.  If we are focused on fixing a problem (being overweight and/or unhealthy), the upcoming holiday season is a dangerous one.  If you've been on plan for any length of time, you DO look and feel better, no doubt about it.  That's why it's important to take a deep breath and focus - focus hard - on what it is that you really want. 

I've been talking about the holidays, but this is true regardless of what time of year it is.  Life continues to happen and anytime life happens, there is always food . . . always.  If we're focused on what we want, and if we're honest with ourselves about what it is that we most want, we will make the secondary choices that support that fundamental choice.

Five years ago, I knew that what I wanted most was to get to a healthy weight.  I made some hard choices, but those choices supported what I most wanted.  There are no regrets!

What do you really want today?  Identify what it is that you want, focus on it, then choose wisely :-)

Getting in the Game

"Health is not a spectator sport."  Is your first instinct to nod in agreement, or are you thinking, "rats!!" :-)  It's true . . . if we want to be optimally healthy, being as active and vibrant as we can possibly be for as long as possible, we have to get in the game.

This quote is from "Dr. A's Habits of Health," a book written by Take Shape for Life's co-founder, Dr. Wayne Scott Andersen.  My husband and I have worked our way through this book a couple of times, and I do mean worked our way.  It's a fabulous book and the companion guide, "Living a Longer, Healthier Life" is designed to not only expand on his "Habits of Health" book, but also is a workbook so that the reader can apply the Habits of Health principles to his/her own life.  I highly recommend both books!

I'm really good at studying and learning.  I'm an avid reader and enjoy the whole learning process, and I believe in being a lifelong learner.   However, reading, studying and learning in and of itself, as good as those things are, won't do a thing to get me healthy or keep me healthy. 

Prior to starting on Take Shape for Life, I had done a lot of reading and studying.  I had a good grasp of nutrition and understood the health risks of obesity.  I had an entire shelf of books on different diets (you name it, if somebody published a book about it, the book was probably on my shelf). I would often pull one of the books down to read, hoping a chapter or two would somehow spark enough motivation to get me moving down the scale again.  Unfortunately, I did a lot of my reading while eating cookies or chips . . . I kid you not.  I used to say that my obesity (my all-time high weight was 268 on my 5'5" frame) wasn't due to not knowing what to do or a failure to grasp the health risks. 

Knowing and doing are two entirely different things.  If we want to reach a healthy weight, if we want to be as healthy as we can possibly be, we have to stop being a spectator and get in the game.  It simply won't happen by osmosis.  I'm certainly not advocating that anyone stop reading about health - in fact, I HIGHLY recommend Dr. Andersen's book to anyone who wants to create long-term health in their lives.  I just know that reading alone, even Dr. A's book, won't do it for us.  We can know all of the ins and outs of why it's important to eat every 3 hours and we can have the low-glycemic list memorized, but if we aren't doing it, the information is useless.

Once we're in the game (and since you're reading this, I'm guessing that you're in the game!), the next challenge is to stay in the game.  I've never seen a team decide half-way or 3/4 of the way through a game that, since they're ahead and doing well, that they can quit early.  Even when a team has a comfortable margin and their win is a foregone conclusion, they stay in the game until it's over.  We have to do the same!  For us, the game isn't over when we reach our goal . . . it's never really over as long as we're on this earth.  Every day between now and goal is a day where you have to make choices to move forward.  That doesn't change when you reach your goal - some of the options will change, but you will still have choices to make and those choices will either move you forward or take you back.  The game continues!

If you're inclined to sit on the bleachers, it's time to get off.  If you're currently in the game, keep going!  You'll do that with the choices you'll make today.  Choose wisely :-)