Staying in the Game

In my last blog I wrote about not quitting half-way through the game.  I know that's easier said than done!  How do you keep going when you just want to be done?

First of all, I understand completely that feeling.  I got tired of eating the food and I got tired of not eating so many other things.  It took me two days short of 11 months to reach my goal and while the months went fast, especially as I look back, there were some mighty long days!  It wasn't always fun.

I remember that about four months into the program I started questioning how long I would be on plan.  It was just before Thanksgiving and I had 26 people coming to my house for dinner that year, so I knew that I'd be doing a lot of cooking and baking.  I'd made really good progress with my weight loss and had dropped several sizes, so I was in a much better place than I'd been when I started the plan that June.  I toyed with taking a small break to really enjoy Thanksgiving dinner and I also considered taking a break between Thanksgiving and New Years and then starting in again on January 2. 

I considered this, but I didn't do it.  In fact, I stayed on plan through the holidays and lost 18 pounds between Thanksgiving and New Year's Day.  When I reached New Year's Day, I didn't know that it would be over 5-1/2 more months until I reached my goal, but I was really happy that I'd continued to make progress through what is admittedly the toughest time of the year.

So how and why did I do that?  Again, it wasn't easy, but I stayed on plan because I knew that what I wanted most was to get to a healthy weight and get on with the rest of my life, and I wanted it more than I wanted the food.  I really, really wanted the food - don't get me wrong - but I wanted something else even more.

Chapter 3 of Dr. A's Habits of Health is entitled, "Motivation for Change."  He describes a typical and very predictable pattern that most of us will recognize from our past dieting experiences, a pattern based on wanting to change to fix a problem.  Here's the pattern:

1. Emotional conflict leads you to act
2. Because you've acted, you feel better - even if the situation hasn't changed much
3. Feeling better takes the pressure off, lessening the emotional conflict
4. Less emotional conflict means there's less reason to continue doing the things that reduced the conflict in the first place
5. Since you feel better, you no longer feel a pressing need to follow through on your actions.
6.  And the original behavior returns.

That is how we've ended up in a yo-yo dieting pattern, losing and gaining, losing and gaining over the years.  If we are focused on fixing a problem (being overweight and/or unhealthy), the upcoming holiday season is a dangerous one.  If you've been on plan for any length of time, you DO look and feel better, no doubt about it.  That's why it's important to take a deep breath and focus - focus hard - on what it is that you really want. 

I've been talking about the holidays, but this is true regardless of what time of year it is.  Life continues to happen and anytime life happens, there is always food . . . always.  If we're focused on what we want, and if we're honest with ourselves about what it is that we most want, we will make the secondary choices that support that fundamental choice.

Five years ago, I knew that what I wanted most was to get to a healthy weight.  I made some hard choices, but those choices supported what I most wanted.  There are no regrets!

What do you really want today?  Identify what it is that you want, focus on it, then choose wisely :-)

Getting in the Game

"Health is not a spectator sport."  Is your first instinct to nod in agreement, or are you thinking, "rats!!" :-)  It's true . . . if we want to be optimally healthy, being as active and vibrant as we can possibly be for as long as possible, we have to get in the game.

This quote is from "Dr. A's Habits of Health," a book written by Take Shape for Life's co-founder, Dr. Wayne Scott Andersen.  My husband and I have worked our way through this book a couple of times, and I do mean worked our way.  It's a fabulous book and the companion guide, "Living a Longer, Healthier Life" is designed to not only expand on his "Habits of Health" book, but also is a workbook so that the reader can apply the Habits of Health principles to his/her own life.  I highly recommend both books!

I'm really good at studying and learning.  I'm an avid reader and enjoy the whole learning process, and I believe in being a lifelong learner.   However, reading, studying and learning in and of itself, as good as those things are, won't do a thing to get me healthy or keep me healthy. 

Prior to starting on Take Shape for Life, I had done a lot of reading and studying.  I had a good grasp of nutrition and understood the health risks of obesity.  I had an entire shelf of books on different diets (you name it, if somebody published a book about it, the book was probably on my shelf). I would often pull one of the books down to read, hoping a chapter or two would somehow spark enough motivation to get me moving down the scale again.  Unfortunately, I did a lot of my reading while eating cookies or chips . . . I kid you not.  I used to say that my obesity (my all-time high weight was 268 on my 5'5" frame) wasn't due to not knowing what to do or a failure to grasp the health risks. 

Knowing and doing are two entirely different things.  If we want to reach a healthy weight, if we want to be as healthy as we can possibly be, we have to stop being a spectator and get in the game.  It simply won't happen by osmosis.  I'm certainly not advocating that anyone stop reading about health - in fact, I HIGHLY recommend Dr. Andersen's book to anyone who wants to create long-term health in their lives.  I just know that reading alone, even Dr. A's book, won't do it for us.  We can know all of the ins and outs of why it's important to eat every 3 hours and we can have the low-glycemic list memorized, but if we aren't doing it, the information is useless.

Once we're in the game (and since you're reading this, I'm guessing that you're in the game!), the next challenge is to stay in the game.  I've never seen a team decide half-way or 3/4 of the way through a game that, since they're ahead and doing well, that they can quit early.  Even when a team has a comfortable margin and their win is a foregone conclusion, they stay in the game until it's over.  We have to do the same!  For us, the game isn't over when we reach our goal . . . it's never really over as long as we're on this earth.  Every day between now and goal is a day where you have to make choices to move forward.  That doesn't change when you reach your goal - some of the options will change, but you will still have choices to make and those choices will either move you forward or take you back.  The game continues!

If you're inclined to sit on the bleachers, it's time to get off.  If you're currently in the game, keep going!  You'll do that with the choices you'll make today.  Choose wisely :-)

Don't Get Spooked!

Happy Wednesday and Happy Halloween!  In my past, Halloween was the beginning of an all-out food fest that didn't end until I was in a sugar-induced stupor on January 2.  Between Halloween and New Year's, it wasn't unusual for me to pick up at least 10 pounds - yikes!

I have a terrible sweet tooth that I inherited from my dad (he's the only person  I know who will put PB&J on his grilled cheese sandwiches, and I've seen him put it on hamburgers once or twice).  When my children were young, I would sort through their trick-or-treat bags and take out all of the "yucky" candy bars (I know, I'm bad . . . the kids eventually figured out what I was doing and I was busted).

Five years ago, being on 5&1 and staying on plan meant keeping my hands out of my grandchildren's trick or treat bags (a sugar-aholic is shameless . . . ), but it wasn't easy.  Halloween was the first big test of my commitment to stay on plan, so I approached the day with a bit of trepidation.  When the moment finally arrived and I stared down all that candy, I realized that once I started eating it I probably wouldn't be able to stop, and I knew that once I DID stop, I'd feel awful - physically and mentally.  That was one of the first times on plan that I can remember sensing a serious threat looming to my weight loss journey, and my response was to think ahead and not get caught up in the moment.

I'm writing about this now because I'm guessing that some of you will be facing down a lot of candy and chocolate today.  I'm encouraging you to anticipate the temptations and decide what you're going to do and how you're going to respond.

Planning ahead is critical on this plan.  So many of us are impulsive eaters, and I know that there were many times when I found myself eating almost before I realized it.  That was always followed by regret, but it was too late to undo what had been done.  When we take the time to anticipate temptation and plan how we're going to respond, we're more likely to be successful.

Eating my Medifast meals on time was key to keeping me on plan, even when faced with some of my favorite sweets.  Because I was eating my meals at regular intervals, my blood sugar stayed stable and my cravings didn't get out of hand.  Because I wasn't hungry, it was much easier to walk away.  Keeping a crunch bar handy can also be helpful if the craving continues - they really satisfy my sweet tooth!

The most important thing you can do ahead of time is to spend some time thinking about what you really want.  When you're not facing a temptation, it's much easier to focus on what you really want (and what you REALLY want isn't the Halloween candy . . . ).  Get a clear picture in your mind now of what you want - think about how you'll look and feel at your goal.  If you get that picture in your mind, you'll be in a better position to make choices that will support your goal.

I'll talk more about the holidays in upcoming posts, but I'm encouraging you to have a solid plan in place for today.  Getting through this sugar-infused day will position you for success as we move closer to those OTHER holidays!

It's all about making choices to support what we really want. Choose wisely :-)

Toxic Perfectionism

I heard it said that "perfection is the enemy of excellence."  What this means is that we can get so focused on wanting to do things perfectly that we become paralyzed, not willing to take the first step out of fear of failure.  Excellence is often born out of failure and the things we learn from failing, then trying again.  Generally I am an "all or nothing" kind of person.  If I can't give something 100%, I don't even want to try, and if I try to give 100% and fall short, I focus on where I slipped up rather than celebrating the success I had.  Can anybody identify with this?

This is really a toxic form of perfectionism and it can absolutely paralyze us and keep us from even starting.  We look at all of the potential obstacles and unless we know ahead of time exactly how we're going to overcome each one, we give up because the fear of failure overwhelms us.

While I stayed on plan and stayed in the fat-burning state the entire 11 months it took me to lose 120 pounds, my path thus far in maintenance (4-1/2 years) has been less straightforward.  I've shared with you that, to quote a friend of mine, "maintenance isn't for sissies." :-)  For a recovering perfectionist like myself, doing maintenance less than 100% "right" could trigger a serious backslide - you know, the old "if I'm not going to be good then I might as well be really, really bad" mentality.  However, please note that I am now a RECOVERING perfectionist!

What this means is that I am learning that the most important thing is to keep moving forward.  When I fall down (notice I didn't say "if"), I no longer waste time beating myself up.  I try to figure out what happened, because I want to learn from my mistake, but then I just refocus on what I want and keep on going.  When I've found myself hovering dangerously close to the top of my goal range and my jeans get tight,  I've had to figure out what happened and then take steps to reign things in. 

For those of you who are still on your weight loss journey, I want to encourage you to do two things.  First of all, I really encourage you to stay on plan, because that is by far the fastest and surest way to reach your goal.  Secondly, if you do find that you've gotten off plan, don't waste any time beating yourself up - just pick yourself up and keep moving forward!  Do spend some time (but not TOO much!) and try to determine what happened and why, but then move on.  Even if you don't do this perfectly, as long as you don't allow missteps to keep you from moving forward, you'll reach your goal - one day, one meal, and one choice at a time . . . choose wisely :-)

Motivation for Permanent Change

In Dr. A's Habits of Health (a fabulous book written by Take Shape for Life's co-founder and Medifast's medical director, Dr. Wayne Scott Andersen), Dr. Andersen writes "Change motivated by conflict will always be temporary; change motivated by desired outcomes can lead to permanent change."  His point is that to make change permanent, we need to move from solving a problem to creating something in our lives.

When I started my weight loss plan, I was trying to solve a couple of problems - my obesity and my diabetes.  My blood sugar returned to normal within one week of starting the program, so that "problem" began to improve almost immediately.  Week by week, as I saw the pounds melt off and I dropped size after size, the pain of obesity began to ease.  Had my focus remained on solving my problems, I'm not sure I would have ever reached my goal.  By the time I'd lost 60 pounds and was 200 pounds, I looked and felt a LOT better.  I was out of women's sizes and my blood sugar remained normal.  I was pretty tired of being on plan and I remember toying with the idea of quitting.  I remember walking through the grocery store, loading my cart with lean protein and my greens while smelling great things from the bakery.  I took note of all of the people pushing carts loaded with very Medifast-unfriendly food, and many of these people were quite a bit heavier than I was.  I remember being mad that I was still on such a restrictive plan while other people were eating all of the "fun stuff," and I began to rationalize.  I was 55, I had 4 grandchildren, I was wearing size 16, and I momentarily thought that where I was at was good enough.

Thankfully, I came out of that thinking pretty quickly, before I allowed it to take me down a road I didn't want to take.  What brought me back and kept me moving forward was a vision I had in my mind of being at a healthy weight and wearing a small size.  I imagined the joy at finally reaching my goal, and I knew if I stopped short of my goal I would feel like I had settled for less than what I really wanted.

What I didn't realize at the time was that I had done exactly what Dr. A wrote about - I moved from solving a problem to creating something in my life.  My focus was on moving forward towards something I wanted rather than moving away from something I didn't want.  Ultimately, that made all of the difference for me.

It still makes a difference.  My focus now is on continuing on the path to optimal health.  Optimal health looks different for each of us, but I have a clear vision in my mind of what optimal health is for me.  As long as I stay focused on what I want to create in my life, I am motivated to make the choices necessary to continue moving forward.

Today we each have to choose if we're going to look back at what brought us to this program, or if we're going to look forward at what we want to create in our lives.  I'd rather create than problem solve - how about you?  Creating something new and wonderful in your life will happen one day, one meal and one choice at a time.  Choose wisely :-)

Why I Didn't Cheat

One question I get asked a lot is, "How did you manage to stay on plan without cheating for almost a year?" 

The answer really isn't easy, and sometimes I'm almost hesitant to admit that I didn't cheat, especially when I can just tell that the person asking me is hoping to hear that yes, I got off plan numerous times, then got back on and got to my goal. 

There are many, many people on program who did exactly that - found themselves off plan from time to time, but eventually they reached their goal.  They have nothing but my deep admiration and respect, and I applaud them for their gritty tenacity and never-give-up spirit.

But that wasn't me. 

First of all, I was scared to death to get off plan.  I'd finally found something that WORKED - I was losing weight and I felt GOOD, unheard of on every other diet I'd ever gone on.  I was faithfully logging my meals, involved with the on-line community here, and just plain had my head in the game.  Because I had failed miserably on every other weight loss plan I'd ever gone on (and I'd been on just about every plan, sane and crazy, that was out there), it seemed incredible to find something that actually worked.  I was afraid that if I got off plan and shifted my focus, I might never be able to get it going again.  I was researching weight loss surgery options on line (including lap band in Mexico because it was cheaper . . . ) when I found information about Take Shape for Life/Medifast.  I was pretty desperate and felt that if this plan didn't work, I didn't know what I'd do.

So fear kept me motivated :-).  I was also sick to death of dieting, having done so for the majority of two solid decades.  I was tired of always either being on a diet or feeling guilty because I wasn't on a diet and needed to be, or researching the NEXT sure thing diet.  This time, I was ready to just get it done.  I took the mindset that this wasn't going to be for the rest of my life, that this was a season in my life I'd set aside to get healthy.  I told myself that all the things I wasn't eating while on 5&1 would eventually come back and I'd be able to enjoy them at a healthy weight.

I was tired of feeling guilty about what I ate.  Almost every time I ate something "bad", I'd feel guilty, knowing that I "shouldn't" be eating it.  That guilt was magnified many times over when I'd eat the forbidden food while on a diet.  When I started on 5&1, I decided that I wanted to really enjoy what I was eating, and I wanted to be able to eat it without feeling guilty about it.  The wonderful thing is that now I CAN eat pretty much what I want, in moderation, and I don't feel guilty anymore.  That is an amazing feeling of freedom!  Also, because I no longer feel guilty, I don't have guilt that ends up fueling a binge.

So that's WHY I stayed on plan.  Now let me share with you how I did it.

I planned, planned, planned - every meal every day.  I faithfully logged my meals and my water intake every day so I kept myself accountable.  I would generally sit down in the evening and log everything I planned for the next day, right down to the lean & green (if I knew ahead of time what we were going to have).  I'd get my shake ready, mix up my soup, and put my oatmeal packet and a bar in my purse, ready for work the next morning.  Because I logged everything ahead of time, I knew every day how many calories and carbs I had allotted myself, which made it easier to turn down tempting treats.  And I mean I logged everything - weighed my meat, measured my veggies, and made sure that if it went in my mouth, it was logged on my meal plan for the day.  If I had a day when I was going to be on the go all day, I made oatmeal muffins and cream soup bread and made sure that I had packets of shakes or cappuccino with me (I lost my weight before the crunch bars, pretzels, cheese puffs and bites which make on-the-go days SO much easier now!).  I had extra meals in my purse, at my desk, and in my car, and I kept an extra shaker bottle in my desk drawer.  I left no room for failure, and I wanted to make sure that I never was in a position where I needed to eat and didn't have anything with me.  That said, I also came to realize that I would NOT die if I didn't eat immediately, that I really COULD wait to eat, if need be :-).

Lastly, I finally admitted that I was incapable of losing weight on my own.  I asked God every day to give me the strength I needed for that day, and I found Him to be faithful to my very earnest prayer.  Because I couldn't run to food for comfort, I realized all over again that He really IS my true Source of comfort! 

So that's pretty much why I stayed on plan and how I did it.  It certainly wasn't easy, and there were many days I didn't wake up joyful that I was facing another day of 5&1 :-).  But I did, and I don't have any regrets.  I reached my goal over 3 years ago and am still maintaining a healthy weight.  It was definitely worth it!

So that's my story - how about you?  It doesn't matter if you're just starting the plan, or if you're restarting for the umpteenth time.  Today can be the first in a series of on-plan days that will ultimately lead you to your goal.  And you'll reach your goal one day, one meal, and one choice at a time . . . choose wisely :-)

Oh Really??????

On our way home from Chicago last Wednesday night, we passed a billboard for a bariatric surgeon.  The billboard has been up for a couple of years but it still riles me every time I see it.  The billboard's message: "Obesity is a Disease, Not a Decision."  Every time I see that sign, all I can think is, "Oh really????"

The billboard really frustrates me (actually makes me angry, if the truth be told).  It gives the impression that obesity is something that can't be helped - it's a disease that apparently you "catch."  The billboard gives the distinct impression that an individual's decisions have nothing to do with their obesity. Again, I can only ask, "Oh really????"

As long as people think that they are somehow helpless victims of this epidemic, somehow caught in the throes of a disease called "obesity," they will view themselves as powerless to escape.  Disease is viewed as something to be treated externally by someone else, whether the treatment is in the form of medication or, in the case of the physician on this billboard, through surgery.  Disease somehow implies that there is little to no personal responsibility involved.  After all, it's not a decision.

Ugh! 

The truth is that while we may not have decided to become obese (in that sense, it's not a decision because most rational people don't one day decide that they want to be obese), the hundreds and thousands of decisions we made along the way brought us to the point of obesity.  If obesity is a disease, it is one that we inflicted on ourselves one decision at a time.

Owning up to that is an important step in reversing our obesity.  When I saw "268" on the scale, I knew I'd done it to myself, one forkful at a time.  Because I was able to accept responsibility for what I'd done to my body and acknowledged that the Type 2 diabetes and high cholesterol I had was a direct result of my obesity and the choices I'd made, I was eventually able to make the decision to get healthy.  Just as I got obese one decision at a time, I got to a healthy weight that same way - one choice and one decision at a time.

It's not easy to turn things around, but it IS possible.  That's not just my own story, but it's the story of so many others I know who finally made the same decision I did.  We aren't helpless, and we aren't victims.  We have the ability to choose a different path that can lead us to being healthier than we ever thought possible.   With all due respect to the surgeon who posted that billboard, obesity IS a decision.  And we know it can be reversed in a matter of weeks or months, one choice at a time.  Choose wisely :-)