Good Choice/Bad Choice

Hi everyone! I'm back after a great week away at our (rented) lake cottage. It was a good mix of rest, relaxation, family time, and time to do some short and long-range planning for our business.

I came home on Saturday weighing a pound less than when I left for the cottage - there haven't been too many vacations in my life where I could say that! For most of the week, we stuck to grilled meat and fresh fruit and veggies (I'm in maintenance, so fruit is definitely on the list!), took some long walks and used MF foods (mostly bars and the new puffs and pretzels) for our snacks. This kept both the grocery budget and the calorie/carb count WAY down :-).

The funny thing was that after getting home on Saturday, when I went to the grocery store to pick up what we needed for the week, I wanted some kind of a dessert in the worst way. I say "the worst way" because I wasn't thinking, "a piece of ***** sounds good," or "I'd enjoy having *****;" this was more of a "I NEED *****" type of want. I actually wandered the store and picked up several different items, intending to buy something, take it home, and then devour it. But I didn't.

First of all, I read the nutrition label on the back of each item and couldn't quite bring myself to eating that many empty calories, carbs and fat grams. Secondly, and more importantly, I (finally!) recognized that the drive to get something, the "I need ****" was being fueled by something other than normal hunger. Coming home from vacation, dealing with unpacking and settling back into a normal routine, anticipating a busy upcoming week all resurrected that old food demon that looks to food for stress relief. Yikes!

Even when I realized what was driving my desire for some type of dessert, I didn't immediately recuperate - I still wanted to get something and faced the "do I want to make a good choice or a bad choice?" dilemma.

Both of my daughters use the "good choice/bad choice" question with their children as part of their disciplinary toolbox, as a way of encouraging their children (ages 6, 4-1/2, and 2-1/2 year old twins) to think through what they're about to do and the possible consequences, and then (hopefully) make the right choice. A few months ago, my 4-1/2 year old granddaughter was asked that question when she was on the brink of making a bad choice, and it triggered a meltdown for her where she screamed (for more than a few minutes), "I don't WANT to make a good choice!"

That's how I felt Saturday night. I didn't WANT to make a good choice! I wanted to buy whatever I wanted and eat the entire thing, and I actually battled those feelings for a few minutes as I finished my grocery shopping. The good news is that the "good choice" won :-). What's really interesting to me is that the minute I walked out of the store with my groceries, I felt a rush of relief. I had battled and won - thank you, Lord! It was a real sense of victory that I had, indeed, made the right choice, and I was glad that I had.

I know now that if I had made a different choice, I would have eaten something for the wrong reasons and would NOT have felt good about it later. Even in maintenance, where all food is really "back on the table," I still have to pay attention not only to what I eat, but why I'm eating it to begin with. When I suddenly feel an overwhelming urge to eat something now (and the something isn't a meal because I'm truly hungry), that's my cue to take a deep breath and take a step back to assess what's really going on.

One of the things I learned while on the Take Shape for Life/Medifast 5&1 journey is that food doesn't fix anything, except, of course, true physical hunger. Food is incapable of fixing any of the emotional needs we have. we are throwing food down a pit without a bottom when we try, because food will never satisfy those needs. We buy into the lie that eating something will make us feel better, only to be filled with remorse and frustration and even disgust as we're wiping the last crumbs from our face. For me, as I have shared before, part of my own weight loss journey was learning to really turn to the Lord, my TRUE Source of comfort, when I was faced with the stuff of life. Breaking those ties to emotional eating has brought such freedom to my heart and my life. I know that had I not learned to walk away from that bondage, I would not have reached my goal and definitely would not be maintaining in my goal range 15 months later.

So today is back to business for me, and since it's a Monday, it's probably back to business for you, too! Who's committed to an on-plan day today?