Complacency and Fear

An important component on our weight loss journey is getting - and keeping - our head in the game.  Along with keeping our head in the game is the challenge of managing the emotional changes that accompany our weight loss.  The meal portion of the plan is simple - all we have to do is follow the 5&1 and the weight comes off!  We don't even have to believe the program will work, we just have to do it.  The mental and emotional part of the journey is far more daunting.

Several friends of mine have done really well on plan and have gotten within striking distance of goal.  Interestingly, as goal loomed on the horizon for them, something happened to get them off plan.  A couple of friends momentarily stepped off and then got right back on plan, while others have struggled to get back on plan after watching several unwanted pounds return.

What my friends experienced is something I've seen over and over again.  When people are closing in on goal, there is a real danger that they will either experience complacency or they'll experience fear.

Complacency often settles in because by the time someone is within ten pounds of goal, particularly if they've lost a lot of weight - they feel SO much better about themselves, they're in smaller sizes and they look and feel pretty "normal."  They may now be smaller than many of their friends, which makes it hard to stay on plan when all of their friends are eating other things.  I know this was true of me when I was about ten pounds away from goal.  I was in a size 10 by that time, the same size as many of my friends, yet they were eating things that were still off-plan for me.  There were times when I just wanted to be done with the plan and say "good enough."  I'd lost over 100 pounds, seen my blood sugar return to normal and I looked and felt pretty good!  The problem was, even though I was in a size 10, I wasn't at a healthy BMI and I wasn't at my goal.  Complacency definitely reared its ugly head and I had to refocus over and over again on what I really wanted, and what I really wanted was to be healthy, and I didn't want to settle.

The other emotion that often catches people by surprise is fear.  We get really good at losing weight and being on 5&1 becomes a safe place for us.  After years of battling weight, we finally found something that actually works and we want to stay in our cocoon forever.  The thought of reaching our goal can be scary, as it means that what has become familiar is about to change as we begin to introduce food groups back into our diet.  We can become afraid that we'll start gaining the weight back.  I've seen people self-sabotage so that they stay in a gain-lose cycle because it feels safer than facing the unknown of being at their goal weight.

For those of us who have used our weight as a protective shield, closing in our goal means we aren't invisible to people any more.  People are commenting about the weight we've lost and we're getting compliments, and that can become uncomfortable.  For many women, having other men suddenly noticing us can be extremely unsettling.  If we don't acknowledge the fear and find healthy ways to address it, we can find ourselves heading in the wrong direction once again.

A while back I read a good definition of fear:  False Evidence Appearing Real.  This definition was part of a devotional that I read about how we deal with the challenges in our lives.  The devotional talked about the story from the Gospel of Matthew, when Jesus walked on the water.  One of his disciples, Peter, stepped out of the boat at Jesus' invitation and began to walk towards Him.  As long as Peter kept his eyes on Jesus, he was fine, but when he looked at the waves around him, he immediately began to sink.  The devotional said that "the circumstances of our lives, whether unusual crises or everyday difficulties, batter our senses into believing untruths.  We cower at the authority of these winds and waves--these very concrete illusions--as though their authority is real.  It isn't.  We must do what is extremely difficult to do--ignore them."

When I faced many of those fears as I approached my goal, I had to choose to keep moving forward and trust that just as God was faithful to me each step of the way on my weight loss journey, He would also be faithful to me as I reached my goal and beyond.  I knew I couldn't lose the weight on my own and I knew (and I still know!) that I would need to depend on the Lord and keep my eyes on Him to keep the weight off.  As long as I do that, I can ignore the waves around me and keep on walking!  And so can you :-) 

As I approached the fourth year anniversary of reaching my goal (I'll celebrate that anniversary three months from today!), I still depend on the Lord to give me the strength I need to make the choices I need to make.  Like you, this is a daily walk for me - one meal and one choice at a time.  Choose wisely :-)